I haven't really gone anywhere but I've returned after 13 days of silence.
I think it was John Lennon who said something about life happening while you're making other plans.
I've been meaning to write...really! But then life keeps getting in the way.
Anyway, would it surprise you to know that Pesach starts one week from tonight and Frume Sarah hasn't even begun the process of changing out her kitchen?
It's the same damn story every year. I think I have a mental block to this chag. I mean, it isn't as though Pesach sneaks up on me. In fact, a few days before Purim, I am already getting that sinking feeling inside. "It's just four weeks away...just four weeks away..." I simply despise this holiday.
It's not the seder...so don't start writing in about how much you love the seder and how great Passover is because you love the seder, blah, blah, blah. Uh...hello? Passover is waaaaaaaaaaaaay more than the seder -- all three of them! (The Frume Sarah Family Seder on night one, the Congretional Seder on night two, & the PC Family Seder on the Saturday night during Pesach) If it was just about the seder...I'd freakin' love this holiday! Are you kidding me? Frume Sarah is all about rites and rituals. The Seder is like the epitome of Bibliodrama. Sign me up!
It's the food. I just can't deal with the pesadike food. And now that I have kids (one of whom is even pickier than I ever was!), it is even more complicated. There are just so many restrictions and I have trouble figuring out what to make and I don't like most of it and so on and so on.
You know...I could eat whatever I wanted in the house and no one would be the wiser. If keeping Pesach to such an extent is such a burden, I could just chuck the whole thing.
And yet...
Generations of oppression and forty years in the desert. Does my discomfort really compare to those of our ancestors? It's a small price to pay for freedom, this yearly commemoration.
So while I complain bitterly, and belive-you-me I do complain bitterly, I feel a deep sense of gratitude that I can enjoy my religion and customs free from the bondage and enslavement of generations past. Each grumble is matched by a silent prayer of gratitude to the Freedom Fighter, who brought me out of slavery to a place of redemption.
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2 comments:
Welcome back!! I've been anxiously anticipating your return. Pesach is tough for us starch lovers.
I vouch for the complaining.
However, you always seem reasonable about it, like you know your limitations. I'm lucky in that I really like some pesadik food (matza brie, matzah meal pancakes, seder mints) and truly love other food that can be eaten during Passover (eggs, strawberries, cheese). But I'm really truly lucky because I go where Mom plans on the meals and cooks for me. And even if I don't like it, at least I don't have the additional problem of trying to make a picky-kid eat.
In a way, Passover is a back to nature type of holiday, similar to Sukkot, except Sukkot is about where you live and Passover is about what you eat (or how you live if I want to be non-prosaic).
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